Thursday, April 3, 2008
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Why my kids are weird*
* (With apologies to Pamela Ribon. I kind of used her book titles).
Before I start I want to say that I love my kids. I couldn't imagine life without them. But they do some strange things.
My daughter talks to imaginary friends. Yes, I know. A lot of kids have imaginary friends. But, my daughter only talks to them in the bathroom when she is going potty. She will babble away for ten minutes about her day, what she wants for dinner, why she is going potty, and who got into trouble at pre-school. I'm not sure why she only talks to them in the bathroom. She must have locked them in there so she has someone to talk to during her potty breaks.
My son, like most six-year olds, can't remember what you asked him to do 30 seconds ago. But, when it is time for bed, he has a whole list of questions that he will never forget to ask. "Am I sick? I'm not going to throw up, or have bad dreams, or think my room is creepy, or dinosaurs aren't going to come down the hall?" It's the same every night. He never believes you the first time so he usually comes out of his bedroom once to ask the same questions again. By the second or third time he will go to sleep.
My daughter likes playing with cars. Her idea of playing cars is lining them up in a perfectly straight line to pretend there is traffic. What fun! I'm sure the Hot Wheels company has been trying to market the traffic jam set for ages. Sometimes she will mix it up a bit and decide to park them all; again in perfectly straight lines.
My son will not eat food if it looks different, but today he ate an ice cube off the floor that the dog had been chewing on. He didn't know the dog was chewing on it, but still, it was on the carpet. When I told him that the dog had been chewing on it he didn't care. Figure that one out. Oh, speaking of eating the dog's things. When he was a toddler he sampled our old dog's puke once. He found it before I did, sampled it, and starting throwing up himself. He was too young to tell me what he ate, but when he pointed it out, it was really hard not to laugh.
My daughter is going to be a medical examiner. She will lay out her babies all over the floor, face down, and cover their bodies. It's like some kind of crime scene when she does it. Wait, I think I posted a picture of that. Yep, here it is.
That is just a sample. But, when you think of it, they have me as a dad. They really have no choice.
Before I start I want to say that I love my kids. I couldn't imagine life without them. But they do some strange things.
My daughter talks to imaginary friends. Yes, I know. A lot of kids have imaginary friends. But, my daughter only talks to them in the bathroom when she is going potty. She will babble away for ten minutes about her day, what she wants for dinner, why she is going potty, and who got into trouble at pre-school. I'm not sure why she only talks to them in the bathroom. She must have locked them in there so she has someone to talk to during her potty breaks.
My son, like most six-year olds, can't remember what you asked him to do 30 seconds ago. But, when it is time for bed, he has a whole list of questions that he will never forget to ask. "Am I sick? I'm not going to throw up, or have bad dreams, or think my room is creepy, or dinosaurs aren't going to come down the hall?" It's the same every night. He never believes you the first time so he usually comes out of his bedroom once to ask the same questions again. By the second or third time he will go to sleep.
My daughter likes playing with cars. Her idea of playing cars is lining them up in a perfectly straight line to pretend there is traffic. What fun! I'm sure the Hot Wheels company has been trying to market the traffic jam set for ages. Sometimes she will mix it up a bit and decide to park them all; again in perfectly straight lines.
My son will not eat food if it looks different, but today he ate an ice cube off the floor that the dog had been chewing on. He didn't know the dog was chewing on it, but still, it was on the carpet. When I told him that the dog had been chewing on it he didn't care. Figure that one out. Oh, speaking of eating the dog's things. When he was a toddler he sampled our old dog's puke once. He found it before I did, sampled it, and starting throwing up himself. He was too young to tell me what he ate, but when he pointed it out, it was really hard not to laugh.
My daughter is going to be a medical examiner. She will lay out her babies all over the floor, face down, and cover their bodies. It's like some kind of crime scene when she does it. Wait, I think I posted a picture of that. Yep, here it is.
That is just a sample. But, when you think of it, they have me as a dad. They really have no choice.
OK, nevermind
Everything is fine with Google Reader. It was the computer at work. Nothing to see here. Google is good. Google IS the Internet.
Hey Google Reader!
This is a test. For some reason my posts are not showing up in Google Reader today. I've been messing with it for a while now. I haven't changed any settings. This is a Google owned product, so what is the deal? Is it just my reader? I don't see how that is possible. I wonder if it has to do with the fact that I wrote my last post in Gmail and sent it here. Could that be the problem? Who am I posing these questions to anyway?
(This is awfully long for a test message)
(This is awfully long for a test message)
Two days until Battlestar Galactica!
I'm not the only one excited, right? I know people watch the show. It's really OK to admit that you like it. Sure, it's science fiction, but there is no need to be ashamed to admit you like it. It's cool to be a geek now, remember? Plus, there is so much more to the show than spaceships flying around. Heck, they don't even show that too much.
OK, you don't like science fiction in general. Do you like politics? Well, Battelstar Galactica has politics. The 7th or 8th in line for the presidency was one of the survivors, but she has been fighting to keep the presidency the whole time. The vice president was an unwitting accomplice to the cylons (he wasn't the vice-president then) and he still talks to the cylon he helped. Is she real? Who knows, but it makes it interesting. Then, when he became president, the cylons came, he surrendered, and helped with the rounding up humans who could be trouble. Nice, huh? Oh, and the current president has cancer, was cured, now has it again and is having visions of Earth. But she is stable, don't worry. Heck, Jimmy Carter saw UFO's, didn't he?
You like drama and suspense? These people are running for their lives, for the survival of their race. Is that drama enough? They live in constant fear that they cylons will show up and wipe them out. It is constant drama and suspense. Sure, you have some people who have ended up having 'relations' with human-form cylons, but really, are soap operas any better? How many times have people found out they married a relative on a soap opera.
Now, if you only like comedies I can't convince you to watch BSG. There isn't much funny about hoping your race can survive another day. But, you should watch it anyway. It's a good idea to watch a well-written show no matter what the format. It's fun to be transported to some other place, jut to get away from daily stress. That's what TV was designed for.
But really, watch it. It's good. Would I lie to you?
OK, you don't like science fiction in general. Do you like politics? Well, Battelstar Galactica has politics. The 7th or 8th in line for the presidency was one of the survivors, but she has been fighting to keep the presidency the whole time. The vice president was an unwitting accomplice to the cylons (he wasn't the vice-president then) and he still talks to the cylon he helped. Is she real? Who knows, but it makes it interesting. Then, when he became president, the cylons came, he surrendered, and helped with the rounding up humans who could be trouble. Nice, huh? Oh, and the current president has cancer, was cured, now has it again and is having visions of Earth. But she is stable, don't worry. Heck, Jimmy Carter saw UFO's, didn't he?
You like drama and suspense? These people are running for their lives, for the survival of their race. Is that drama enough? They live in constant fear that they cylons will show up and wipe them out. It is constant drama and suspense. Sure, you have some people who have ended up having 'relations' with human-form cylons, but really, are soap operas any better? How many times have people found out they married a relative on a soap opera.
Now, if you only like comedies I can't convince you to watch BSG. There isn't much funny about hoping your race can survive another day. But, you should watch it anyway. It's a good idea to watch a well-written show no matter what the format. It's fun to be transported to some other place, jut to get away from daily stress. That's what TV was designed for.
But really, watch it. It's good. Would I lie to you?
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Hooray, I'm Rich!
I just opened open my e-mail to this awesome news:
Isn't that great! Now I can quit my job and spend my whole day on the internet. It's like a dream come true!
Now, I just have to find out where this bank is. Oh, and how much money it really is since they left off a "0". It could be 30 million or 3 million. Hmmm. I may still need some kind of job on 3 million dollars. I'm too young to live off of that for the rest of my life. I'm not exactly sure what a "secured business suggestion" is either. Maybe he is just looking for an idea for a new product or something. I always have plenty of good product ideas, just ask my wife. Maybe she sent my name to this guy.
Now, even though I'm going to be rich, I don't plan on changing the blog. There won't be any bling decorating the site, but my bathroom at home will be made out of 24 karat gold.
Don't tell my wife. I'm going to surprise her for Mother's Day.
Isn't that great! Now I can quit my job and spend my whole day on the internet. It's like a dream come true!
Now, I just have to find out where this bank is. Oh, and how much money it really is since they left off a "0". It could be 30 million or 3 million. Hmmm. I may still need some kind of job on 3 million dollars. I'm too young to live off of that for the rest of my life. I'm not exactly sure what a "secured business suggestion" is either. Maybe he is just looking for an idea for a new product or something. I always have plenty of good product ideas, just ask my wife. Maybe she sent my name to this guy.
Now, even though I'm going to be rich, I don't plan on changing the blog. There won't be any bling decorating the site, but my bathroom at home will be made out of 24 karat gold.
Don't tell my wife. I'm going to surprise her for Mother's Day.
What is fun on April Fool's Day?
I was thinking about April Fool's Day, remembering how I was always watching for something to happen in school, and I wondered if there is, or should be, an age limit on April Fool's Day pranks. The funny thing is, when I went into Gmail I noticed this. That page will probably be gone by tomorrow since it is obviously a joke. Just seeing that page made me change my mind a bit. There can be some fun things on the web on April Fool's Day. Google does something every year, I think, and they are usually fun. And, while not positive, I'm pretty sure that this that I found from Whatever is not real either.
So, here is my thought of the day. Fun web jokes that you have to figure out if they are real or not are OK for any age. Stupid pranks, loosening salt shaker tops, tacks on chairs, putting sugar in a salt shaker, etc should be stopped in high school. You can maybe get away with it in college if you are drunk, but be prepared to wake up covered in shaving cream or with your door nailed closed. On final exam day.
Anyone else have any good rules? Any other good April Fool's Day web findings?
So, here is my thought of the day. Fun web jokes that you have to figure out if they are real or not are OK for any age. Stupid pranks, loosening salt shaker tops, tacks on chairs, putting sugar in a salt shaker, etc should be stopped in high school. You can maybe get away with it in college if you are drunk, but be prepared to wake up covered in shaving cream or with your door nailed closed. On final exam day.
Anyone else have any good rules? Any other good April Fool's Day web findings?
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