No, really, I do. Or should I say our family does. Mainly the kids. I think the kids might be some kind of Patient Zero for some new strain of strep. Is that possible since it's a bacteria? Can our house be possessed by Streptococcal bacteria? Maybe they can't move on because they didn't get a fair fight against amoxcillin and they are pissed off. It's like some kind of odd Poltergeist thing happening in our house, expcept these little strep bastards keep coming back and attacking the kids instead of a tree breaking through the house or a TV sucking one of the kids inside. (What did I just say?)
Speaking of Poltergeist, do you remember that scene where the kids are in the room and everything is getting sucked into the gaping, ugly hole that was the closet? I remember being told something like the gross hole was inspired, or made to resemble, strep throat. I'm sure it wasn't, just like Mikey from the Life cereal commercials didn't die by eating Pop Rocks and Drinking Coke. He died by eating Mentos and Coke. Big difference.
Also, the are going to re-make Poltergeist, according to Wikipedia. And, let's face it, if you can't believe Wikipedia, you can't believe anything.
I completely forgot the point of this post.
Anyway, I haven't had strep throat, or anything like that in a long time. I do remember getting bad sore throats in college a few times. I was reminded of it when my daughter was crying about not wanting them to put the stick in her throat. I felt bad lying to her and saying it wasn't a big deal. See, one time when I had the test in college I grabbed the nurse's arm and pulled the stick out of my mouth. So, yes, I lied to my daughter, but it was for her own good. Also, did the doctors not have liquid penicillin when I was a kid? I seem to recall a few times have a very bad sore throat and having to swallow a giant horse pill. What was that about? Heck, when I was a kid I had to have my Tylenol smashed up in a spoon until I was 12. Okay, maybe not that old, maybe 11.
I guess the point of this post (not that I really think there is one anymore) is to stay away from our house for a while. Unless you have your own bio hazard suit.
1 comment:
Made me laugh out loud while waiting for haircut
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