Someone get the license number

I think a truck hit me in the middle of the night. I may have been in shock this morning so I didn't know the extent of the damage. I do now. I ache, my nose is like a faucet, and my eyes keep watering. I've never gotten sick this fast before. I was fine last night when I was at work. I should expect this though, the whole office is sick. With the way the office is set up we should just spit on each other all day. It wouldn't be any different. I'm going to start wearing a Hazmat suit to work. It's the only way to stay healthy.

Karen has a good weekend assignment. I'll get to it later. I can't type anymore.

Food stuff

I had to stop at the store after work last night to get snacks from my son's class. It was after 11pm so of course I had to buy some snacks for me too. For some reason I wanted cookies. Probably because I was surrounded by them. I scanned the shelves looking for something good. Oreos? No, too bad for you. Milanos? No, too pricey? Fudge Stripe? No, not into them tonight? How about some Chips Ahoy? Sounds good.

You know what? They aren't as good as I remember. Did they change the recipe? I wonder if the healthy food people got after them. You know, ever since Dr. Oz went on Oprah talking about bad fats everyone is changing their recipes. Do you know what makes cookies taste good? Fat. Yep. The fattier the better. Lard would be the best. You know those awesome cookies grandma use to make? They were loaded with fat; that's why they tasted so good. Of course, that is why people died at the ripe old age of 50, but you take the good with the bad.

I like President's Choice chocolate chip cookies the best. They are only sold at (the) Jewel around here. They are a generic brand I guess. I'm not sure why I like them so much. I think it's the chips. The chocolate chunk version is the best one. Maybe I should stop there on the way home? Do we need anything?

I had a smoked ham and swiss sandwich on a croissant and a (very) small ceasar salad from the cafeteria at work. It's one of those meals that sounds a lot healthier than it is. I used to work in a restaurant where our worst meal we had was a salad. People would order it thinking they are eating well, and I'd have to hide a smirk. The steak dinner with potato had less calories and fat. I'd much rather have that. Oh, the ceasar salad I had was soaked in dressing. I like it better when I can put it on myself. I usually use about half of what they give me. A little ceasar dressing goes a long way.

That was an exciting post, wasn't it? Tomorrow I will talk about what kind of toothpaste I use.

Sugar and spice

Did you know that salt does not cancel out pepper? Of course you do, but I didn't know that as a kid. I remember being at my step-dad's store and having scrabbled eggs from the microwave. I thought it was so cool making them in the microwave, remember this was in the late 70's early 80's, it probably took longer than making them on the stove. Anyway, I was by myself and I put some salt on the eggs. It came out much faster than I expected. So, I put extra pepper on them. But it was to pepper-y, so I put more salt on them, I think you can see where this is going. I think I would have died from the amount of salt on the eggs if I tried to eat them. I didn't want to waste them though, so I just sat there for a few minutes looking at them deciding what to do. Luckily, someone (I can't remember who now) came along and told me to toss them. Why am I writing this? I don't know. I think the last thing I wrote was too serious, so I'm trying to lighten the mood.

Let's see, what else do I do that was stupid...

I used to get mad at my brother for pointing at me. Almost every night we would have a snack before bed, sometimes it was cereal, sometimes ice cream, never anything healthy. Come on, it was the 70's, sugar was good for you then! We had assigned seats at the table, my brother sat at the end of the table because he was left-handed, I sat on his right. It was the perfect set-up for him. He could eat with his left hand, and rest his right hand on the table and point at me. That's all he would do, but it would drive me crazy. I would try to ignore him, that's what my mom would tell me to do when I complained, but it never worked. He'd just start wiggling it around until I couldn't take it anymore. I would yell at him, loud enough for my mom to hear of course, he'd get yelled at, I'd be told to ignore him, then I'd go back to reading the back of the Cocoa Pebbles box. All was good, until the next night. He only did it during the night time snack; no witnesses then. He was no dummy.

That's not scary enough

Have you heard about the guy who was killed by a shark while SCUBA diving? Let me be more clear. This wasn't a random shark attack, this guy was out with a diving company that baits sharks to get them to come close. Here is the article. Obviously it is sad this man died, I feel bad for his family. I hope this man misunderstood what was going to happen. Maybe he thought that just some little shark species were in the area that they could see; something that wouldn't attack a human.

This quote from the article is very interesting:

To ensure "the best results we will be 'chumming' the water with fish and fish parts," the Web site explains. "Consequently, there will be food in the water at the same time as the divers. Please be aware that these are not 'cage' dives, they are open water experiences."

When did it become uncool to be in a cage to see sharks? I've seen Shark Week, standing in that cage with sharks circling seems terrifying to me. Take a look at this picture from the company's website. Does that look like something people should be doing? Especially if they are not a marine biologists? I know, most of the time the sharks will stay away, it says so on the website, but putting chum in the water to rile them up does not seem like a good idea. I have a feeling the company may be changing their practices. They will probably be sued by the family as well.

"It's not a tumah"

Thank you Arnold for that great quote. I use it all the time. I probably should thank the writer of Kindergarten Cop, but without Arnold's accent and delivery it would just be another line.

I have a headache today. I've had it all day. It's one of those headaches that float around your head. Sometimes it is on the top of my head, then goes to the front, then to the back, then behind my eyeball. It's fun! It's my own fault; I decided to stop drinking soda today. (You can call it pop, soda pop, Coke, sody, whatever is normal in your neck of the woods). I've been reading up on caffeine withdrawal, just to be sure it isn't something else. When John's Hopkins has something about it, you know it is for real.

I don't drink a lot of pop, but it seems no matter how much you take in your body gets used to it and won't stop asking for more. Right now my body is saying, "Hey! You! You think you can cut off our supply? I'll make you wish you were dead."

OK, it's not that bad, but I can't imagine trying to give it up if I drank 7 cups of coffee a day. Can you go to Promises to get off the stuff? "Uh, yeah hi, I need to check in for caffeine addiction. Can you make sure I'm not anywhere near Britney? Thanks!"

So my wife hijacked the blog earlier today. I wasn't going to say anything about my birthday. It seemed weird. Now, what should I do to her blog on her birthday? I have until October to think of something good.

Guest Blogger: Happy Birthday!

This is Mrs. Everything Under the Sun. I've taken over Mike's blog to let EverythingUndertheSun readers know that it is his birthday. You may call it breaking in or an invasion of privacy, I call it guest blogging. I am curious to see what Mike calls it.

Anyway, this is Mike's last year in the 30s so please help me send him good wishes and come out of lurking (I know you're out there) to wish him a happy birthday, he deserves it!

Happy Birthday Mike!

Open up and say ouch!

I know you are all curious how my dentist appointment went. By "you" I mean my sister. It was OK, actually. I was really nervous. As I said, it was a long time since my last cleaning and check up. I'm not fond of having my teeth scraped, or getting in trouble for not flossing, so I have avoided going for a while. Turns out they have some new tools that are not quite as annoying. Who designed those tiny pickaxes that they use anyway? I don't think I want to meet that person. The new ultrasound cleaner the hygienist used was much quieter and didn't cause shivers up my spine as she worked on my teeth. I have to go back for a follow up and have an old filling fixed, but overall the hygienist and dentist were happy. As was I. I'm one of those people that always expects the worst; I was lucky this time.

It's snowing again. I think the schools may be closed tomorrow again as well. This is getting old.